Obama “Yes We Can” Music Video Makes Hillary Cry

During a rare, off-camera, and unscripted moment on the eve of Super Tuesday, Hillary Just Hillary teared up while watching the newly released Obama music video, “Yes We Can.”

Yes We Can - Barack Obama Music Video



Why Hillary Just Hillary teared up remains a mystery, but Political Fallout has speculated as to why the former first lady’s tear ducts may have sprung a minor leak:

5. Senior Campaign Advisor Mark Penn, no relationship to Sean, had just informed his boss that Obama had out-raised her by $18 million in January

4. Video stoked fond memories of a training film produced at Wal-Mart while she served as its first female member (1986-1992). The training video instructed employees on how to resist unionizing efforts with a proven call-and-response technique:

Call: "Can We Bust ‘Em!?"

Response: “Yes We Can!”

3. The Black Eyed Peas will.i.am always make Hillary Just Hillary cry

2. Video reminded her of Bob the Builder episode when Farmer Pickels, despite the efforts of Bob and Wendy’s “Yes-We-Can” optimism, lost his family farm during the agribusiness boon in the ‘90s -- spearheaded by Slick Willy and the Corporate Pigs.

1. Now regrets having cast an absentee vote for herself in New York

Karl Rove Comes Out of Burrow, Sees Shadow: 10 More Months of Fear!

As if on cue, Karl Rove reared his head on Groundhogs’ Day, saw his shadow and predicted “Lots of surprises lie ahead…” (sinister laugh here, eventually drowned out by the sound of Rove stuffing his cheeks with walnuts)

From an op-ed piece in “Newsweek”

“…Maybe we are not seeing the crackup of the GOP. Rather, America is more likely to be at the start of an intense and exciting election. The contest will be hard fought, the actions of the candidates each day hugely significant. It's far too early to draw sweeping conclusions about the health of either party; the presidential race, after all, has barely begun. Lots of surprises lie ahead…”

This is not the first time Rove emerged on Groundhogs’ Day to make a campaign prediction while evoking an undercurrent of fear. I captured the Rovian Groundhog experience on my debut blog, “Witsend Here” in 2006:

The Satiric Press – On Friday, D.C. Karl emerged from his burrow where he’d been hibernating for the past few months, saw his shadow, and predicted 10 more months of fear for the remainder of the political campaign season. Karl Rove, White House Chief of Staff and the President’s top political advisor, made his prediction in front of a prescreened audience of loyal Republican followers. “The United States faces a ruthless enemy," Rove said, "and national security will be the preeminent issue of this years’ campaign.”

The last time D.C. Karl saw his shadow and predicted 10 more months of fear was in 2004, and as it turned out, Karl was right. The unprecedented campaign of fear in 2004 helped President Bush win his reelection bid. While both predictions hinged on the fear of terrorism, the 2004 prediction took a two-pronged fear forecast by throwing homophobia into the mix by way of gay marriage.

There was no doubt as to whether D.C. Karl saw his shadow, for it eclipsed the entire Washington, D.C., area and eastern portions of Virginia. According to Jan Jorgensen, an astronomy professor at the University of Virginia in Charlottesville, “I was in the laboratory making my daily calculations when the sky unexpectedly blackened. I thought for sure we had experienced a partial eclipse of the sun. It wasn’t until later in the day that I heard on the news that it was D.C. Karl’s shadow. Then it all made sense.” Startled by the ominous girth of his own shadow, D.C. Karl was reported to have fled his inaugural speaking engagement (see photo) before he could fully outline his fear forecast.

John McCain: How I Learned To Stop Worrying and Love Bush’s Troop Surge

In times of unchecked war and agression, We the People must ask our leaders

What are you compensating for lately?

Live from the War Room: Sen. John McCain and Gen. Buck Turgidson illustrate they have a lot to compensate for:



(Video produced by Brave New Films)

Hillary Finds Precioussssss New Voice in NH

After her victory in New Hampshire Tuesday, Hillary Just Hillary turned her victory speech into a public confessional, “Over the last week I listened to you and in the process I found my own voice.”

Hillary practices new voice during Pledge of Allegience before springing it on unsuspecting New Hampshire supporters

This begs the following questions (feel free to use either Hillary Just Hillary’s new voice or her old voice when begging these questions, but do listen to your own voice during the pontification process):

-Where had Hillary Just Hillary’s Voice been hiding (“lost") before the New Hampshire Primary?

-Whose voice had she been using up to the point she had found her voice?

To help address these questions, Political Fallout’s crack Crime Scene Investigators have been scouring the campaign trail for clues and has narrowed down the possible answers:

1. Where had Hillary Just Hillary’s Voice been hiding (“lost") before the New Hampshire Primary?

a) Buried under $400,000 unmarked dollar bills stuffed between Tom Vilsack’s mattresses

b) In a haystack between “Let’s Have a Conversation” and “The Hillary I Know”

c) At the DLC convention in Tennessee, which all the Democratic candidates, including Hillary, skipped to attend the Daily Kos convention in Chicago

d) In a dust-coverd box in the White House attic labeled: “Hillary Rodham’s Stuff – 1991”

e) In Terry McAuliffe’ssssss other pantssss pocketsiessss: “In here preciousssss….me haves your voice precisousss. We wants it, we needs it. Must have the precious. They stole it from us. Sneaky little hobbitses. Wicked, tricksy, false! “

2. Whose voice had she been using up to the point she had found her voice?

a) A pre-programmed, poll-tested voice concocted from over 5 million sound bites of HillarySpeak, which had also been poll-tested in several political niches

b) Terry McAuliffe's

c) A watered-down version of James Earl Jones's

d) “Tony's” -- Danny’s imaginary friend from “The Shining”: “Amabo…Amabo!”

e) Millli Vanillli's

Take the Hillary Challenge

Here’s a recent sampling of the New Hillary:



So what do you think?

We taste-tested a random sampling of Political Fallout readers and the overwhelming consensus was that they preferred the Classic Hillary over the New Hillary. We reassured them that it won’t be long before the Classic Hillary reemerges on the political shelves. Although, whether the same marketing genius that helped propel Classic Coke back into its frontrunner as the peoples' preferred pop (or soda for Easterners and coke for Southerners) remains to be seen.

Obama Plagiarizes Bob the Builder in NH Concession Speech

Despite Sen. Barack Obama’s surprise, at least to the pollsters and those who believe them, loss to Sen. Hillary Clinton in New Hampshire tonight, he remained upbeat and positive, borrowing a line from apolitical Bob the Builder to fire up the audience. During a call-and-response component of his concession speech, Obama called out a series of rhetorical questions, only to answer them himself with “Yes We Can.”

Obama's Call: "Can We Do It, America?"

Obama's Response: “Yes We Can!”

Bob the Builder stumps for Obama at local Teamsters' Union rally in New Hampshire

“We’re happy to see that Bob’s message has resonated with Obama,” Wendy, a spokeswoman for Bob the Builder, told Political Fallout. “Bob has always espoused the same message -- a message of change, and we’re glad to see that it has finally gained some traction among eligible voters. My only regret is that Mr. Obama didn’t attribute Bob for using his life-long message. ”

Pseudo-Live Blog of Da Dem Debate

Jumping in a little late to the Democratic debate, but here goes.

Edwards joins Obama in "War of Change" against the Status Quo PrimaDona:

"We got change yes we do.
We got change, how about you?"

Clinton raises her voice:

"You want change, I got the most.
I got the most..."

Cue David Bowie’s “Changes…”

“Ch-ch-ch-changes…Turn and face the strange…”

“Boo, it’s me, Osama bin Laden…”

“Turn and face the strange…”

“Boo, it’s me: George Bush…”

“Ch-ch-ch-changes…”

Richardson, the little kid trapped at his friends when his friend’s parents start family fight over his head, jumps in with humor to ease the tension:

“I’ve seen more civil arguments in hostage negotiations.”

Speaking of change, let’s ch-ch-ch-change the subject.

I finally figured out who Edwards reminds me of when he speaks and gesticulates, using his thumb and forefinger(s) when making points: Quincy, M.D. (from the TV Drama):

Quincy speaking in the morgue over a frozen cadaver: “Sam, can’t you see. If we don’t do anything to stop the meaningless slaughter of people caught in the perpetual cycle of poverty whose only crime was being born under the Reagan era and crushed to death by a maelstrom of trickle-down economics, we’ll be performing millions more autopsies just like this one. Something has to be done before it’s too late, and I intend to do something about it. Pack your bags, Sam, we’re going to an off-shore bank to find some answers and maybe do a little snorkeling…for answers of course."

Scott notices double-team on Hillary: Why don’t New Hampshire voters like you?

That hurt my feelings. (Newsbreak: Hillary has feelings. Details at 10).

Hillary is comparing Obama to Bush? Who in their right mind would want to have a beer with Bush? Don’t people know that drinking beers with Bush is dangerous business? The odds of choking on a pretzel are astounding?

Newsflash: According to Fred Thompson, the Liberals like Obama more than “Law and Order.”

Bill’s eyes are caught in the caught in the what-have-you-done-about-energy-lately headlights. Blink, Bill, blink…Quick, Edwards, loan Bill some of your blinks before his eyes dry up.

Bill says Al Gore is right and deserves the “Noble Price…?”

Political Fallout starts the bidding at $10… Can I get 15? Where’s Leonard Boswell when I need him and his auctioneer skills?

Scott challenges Edwards’ selective memory: “Scott, can’t you see; young children are dying because we don’t have a patients bill of rights…”

Note: John Edwards’ father gets a day off from retirement to attend the debate.

Clinton calls for “Reality Break”: Tsk, tsk, Hillary, even NH voters know that reality and politics don’t mix. Translate change into action. Again another political paradox. Let me check my English to Political Speak Dictionary for confirmation.

Political Action: see oxymoron.

Obama: “Words do matter.” Ain’t that the truth.

Bill feels the pain of do-nothing-Congress. You guys are screwin’ up my state.

Edwards & Obama: We need to unite and galvanize Americans and sick them on those big, mean lobbyists. Grab a bat folks and let’s take to the streets and march on K-Street. Maybe if we’re lucky, we can hook up with Romney’s father on K-Street as he marches with us.

Just Say No to Carbon Taxes. Way to go, you know everyone is going to start taxing carbon, just because you told them not to. Now we’ll never win the "War on Carbon Taxes." Cough…cough…cough…

Richardson reminds us again that he’s the only one who has balanced a budget as governor in New Mexico. Whew…I nearly forgot. Thanks, Bill. Which reminds me: Gov. Culver is the only governor who has been in the classroom over the past 20 years.

Now’s your chance to take back something you said in a previous debate:

Hillary…say it Hillary, say it…Drivers licenses for illegal immigrants….”I pass to the pundits…” I can’t wait to see the pundits run this back for a touchdown afterwards. Go Redskins.

Edwards: Sorry about teasing Hillary about her jacket. Liar, liar, pants on fire Johnny E.; that jacket was horrendous. My neighbor's purse dog has a matching sweater. In the immortal words of Triumph the Insult Dog: "That jacket is good enough for me to poop on..."

Stay tuned for the post-pundit spin. Thanks, but no thanks. Just say no to pundits.

“You spin me right round, baby, like a record baby, right round…”

Yawn, I think I’ll follow Obama’s lead and turn it to football.

Robot Heckles Bill Clinton on Behalf of Sister Souljah During Iowa Stop

Not everyone was happy to see Bill Clinton in Iowa City Tuesday night. Just as Clinton was about to hit his stride, an unidentified robot heckled the former president, who was playing the surrogate role while stumping for his wife, Hillary Clinton, at the Iowa Memorial Union on the University of Iowa campus.

Dressed as a contemporary robot reminiscent of Gort in the 1951 film “The Day the Earth Stood Still” (see pic below), the soon-to-be heckler mounted a chair on the media platform as if it was going to snap a picture of Clinton. The chair began to wobble a bit before fellow journalists offered support, not knowing at the time that they were aiding and abetting a future heckler.

Armed with a plastic microphone, the heckler, Mr. Ifobaca (Mad Robots in Favor of Bill Clinton Apologizing), made his demands:

“I want you to apologize to Sister Souljah!”

Trying to maintain his poise, Clinton initially fell into a sophomoric rebuttal: “Look, look into the mirror... ”

Clearly on a premeditated mission, Mr. Ifobaca began throwing dozens of multicolored slips of paper in the air, thus providing Clinton with the opportunity to recapture his wits and respond:

“You need to find a more responsible ways to protest than throwing graffiti around. “You can disagree with me without killing a tree.”

Most of the crowd laughed at Clinton’s quip (not because he said graffiti, when he meant to say confetti), but some were enraged by the disruption and began booing and yelling at Mr. Ifobaca. One woman, clearly a devout Hillraiser gauging by her Hillary flair adorning her blouse and matching jacket, began screaming at Mr. Ifobaca and waving her arms at the robot as if she intended to scratch his eyes out. Mr. Ifobaca, unperturbed by the woman, namely because he was wearing safety goggles for such occasions, was eventually escorted from the platform and ballroom by security.

After Mr. Ifobaca left, a Hillary Clinton team entered the media pit and made a mad scramble for the littered propaganda, making sure all the calling cards were collected before they fell into the wrong hands. The scene was reminiscent of the 1967 Abbie Hoffman stunt in which he and his fellow demonstrators threw fistfuls of dollars (most fake) down to traders on the New York Stock Exchange, some of whom booed, while others scrambled frantically to grab the money as fast as they could.

No charges were pressed against Mr. Ifobaca, who, unmasked, was not Klaatu, but rather Kembrew McLeod -- a tenured professor in the Communication Studies Department at the UI. McLeod, who has published four books on freedom of expression and intellectual property issues, has a documented history of committing pranks on his web site. McLeod is also a documentary filmmaker, including “Money for Nothing: Behind the Business of Pop,” which won the Rosa Luxemburg Award for Social Consciousness at the 2002 New England Film Festival.

McLeod, President of the Iowa Chapter of MR. IFOBCA has been on a mission for the last 15 years in an effort to get Clinton to apologize for “dissing Sister Souljah while happily accepting the honor of being America’s “'first black president,'” as novelist Toni Morrison once put it. In his manifesto, “Why did I bum rush Bill Clinton?,” Kembrew vows to continue sending an army of robots to all future Clinton appearances until he apologizes to Sister Souljah.

Kembrew made do on his vow Monday night, only Clinton did not reciprocate by publicly apologizing to Sister Souljah, the former member of the outspoken hip-hop group Public Enemy, a crew known for its pro-black politics.

Moreover, Kembrew makes the following claim on his manifesto:

The first time I fully realized Bill Clinton was not on the side of racial andsocial justice was after the “Sister Souljah Moment,” as it has come to be known in political circles. In a mean-spirited move—something straight out of Karl Rove’s playbook—Clinton tried to demonize a young Black woman named Sister Souljah by taking something she said out of context. Clinton did this to ingratiate himself with white upper-middle class swing voters during the 1992 presidential campaign, and he portrayed Sister Souljah as a reckless radical who advocated killing white people. This was patently false, and Bill Clinton knew it, but that didn’t stop him from cynically turning her into a sacrificial lamb that helped save his flagging campaign.

With less than a month left before the caucuses, the question remains whether McLeod or one of his robots will pop up on the campaign trail in Iowa.

Mr. Ifobca (alias Kembrew McLeod) is escorted out of the IMU by Clinton staffers, but vows to be back

Originally posted on "Iowa Independent"