When I think of teabagging, I can’t help but think about John Waters’ “Pecker.”
I was first exposed to teabagging while watching John Waters’ “Pecker” on the big screen in 1998. The film’s protagonist, Pecker, a Baltimore sandwich employee becomes an overnight success when pictures of his eccentric family become the new rage in the modern art world. During a scene in a gay bar, Pecker whips out his 35 millimeter camera and snaps pictures of a stripper teabagging one of the customers, which is strictly forbidden by the female barkeep in spite of customer requests to have the dancers bounce and drag their balls across their balding foreheads – in exchange for a sizeable tip of course.
And now, the GOP is mixing metaphors with its Tax Day Tea Party and call for widespread teabagging across the nation on Tax Day. In a feeble attempt to co-opt the Boston Tea Party, the GOP has inadvertently co-opted teabagging in its mixed-metaphor crossfire.
Ms. Liberty, embarassed by being dragged against her will to rally by Teabaggers, hides her face in shame
The thought of the sexually repressed GOP, armed with fully-loaded DSB (Dreaded Sperm Buildup) teabags and collectively dragging them across the receding landscape of America sends shudders down my spine to my teabags.
Ironically, the GOP and its foot soldiers are aiming their pent-up anger at the Obama administration for increasing taxes and blaming him for the current economic plight, when it was the previous administration, led by He Who Must Not Be Named, which ran up the deficit and broke America’s economic back.
Boy, it must be great to have selective amnesia.
Better yet, it must be great to have selective amnesia.
It’s only fitting that the Howard Beale inspired I’m-Mad-as-Hell-and-I’m-Not-Going-to-Take-It-Anymore faux frenzy has been fueled by the leader of faux news, FOX News, who I imagine is fronting for Lipton. Now Fox News is co-opting Beale -- a byproduct of the satiric film “Network (1976),” which prophesized the co-opting of the news media by sacrificing journalistic integrity for entertainment and higher television ratings. Sound familiar?
Upon the heels of Easter weekend and the celebration of the resurrection of God’s only child, Jesus Christ, the Religious Right (alias GOP) grabbed their pitchforks and stormed the Iowa State Capitol Monday demanding that the Democratic majority put forward a bill that would change the Iowa Constitution by redefining marriage “between a man and a woman.”
This begs the question: W.W.J.D.?
Despite His pledge to help the down trodden, me thinks Jesus, unlike the GOP*, would run away from the oxymoronic Religious Right.
*You know it’s hard out there for the minority.
Moreover, recent GOP actions beg the question:
Which one of the following poses the least threat to Iowans?:
A) GOP gubernatorial candidate Bob Vander Putz vowing, if elected, will use his executive powers to help erode the Iowa Constitution and take over the judicial branch (sinister, Howdy Doody laugh here)
B) God-fearing Christians sending threatening, vindictive, “Your-gonna-burn-in-hell” e-mails to state Dem legislators
C) A man of the cloth espousing the fear-mongering notion that gay marriage is worse than floods, because it “erodes the soul” and “destroys generations”
E) Two same-sex people who love each other and want to make a lifetime commitment to one another
Traditionally, this would be a no-brainer, but we all know the potential harm of blindly sticking to tradition, eh? So I will spell the answer out for you: E.
Now it’s bad enough we have our own homegrown, cornfed zealots to worry about without the Christian Right rounding up the Usual Suspects and shipping them off to Iowa to spew their vitriolic venomous messages of hate. Although Rev. Fred Phelps and his rabid, inbred clan of Homo-Haters have yet to load up their wagons, literally, and head to Iowa, the National Organization for Marriage launched a pre-emptive propaganda attack with a $1.5 million ad campaign intended to promote fear through scripted testimonials of how gay marriage destroyed these peoples’ fragile lives:
National Organization for Marriage’s “Gathering Storm” (This is a Dramatization*)
*On her show the other night, Rachel Maddow took on the ad’s legitimacy by showing bootleg audition tapes somehow procured by the Human Rights Campaign. The video shows straight people auditioning to play straight people whose “straightness” has been threatened by gay marriage.
The Rachel Maddow Show (clips begins at 2:07 minute mark)
As of today this video was pulled from YouTube, because the NOM folks said it was a copyright infringement.
So let me get this straight, using a syllogism if you will:
The National Organization for Marriage fears Rachel Maddow. The National Organization for Marriage is God-fearing. Rachel Maddow is God.
I knew it! I knew all along that God is a lesbian woman.
Thank Rachel for that!
But the laugh last is still on NOM, who really didn’t think through their anti-gay marriage campaign beyond the fear-mongering and bigotry components. NOM dubbed its campaign “2 Million for Marriage.” Or the acronym: 2M4M (translation for the Acronym Challenged: Two Men for Men). Where do they get off promoting such behavior?
What can I say when this satire literally writes itself. I’m looking forward to more satiric servings from NOM, so BRING IT ON!!! (My team of hot-shot lawyers is waiting with open arms...)