Monday, July 5, 2010

Quagmire Stew: A Recipe for Disaster


Preemptive Ingredients:

2 bloodied handfuls of WMD seeds
2 Congressional chambers locked-and-loaded with free-range Chickenhawks
1 Military Industrial Complex armed with a blank check (and no balances)
1 slightly tattered Constitution

Ingredients*:

120,000 to 170,000 homegrown pounds of American flesh** (flak jackets not included)
2 million stockpiled missiles marinade in benzene-based napalm
1 demonic dash of despotism
Several vats of patriotic zeal
A liberal supply of recyclable right-wing propaganda
1 bottomless well of fear
A limited supply of hope

* Feel free to improvise ingredients to satisfy any shifts in political winds
**To feed larger blood-lust appetites, add more Faustian flesh as needed

Preparation:

Strategically place (but not too strategically, thus hinting any semblance of an exit strategy) a manufactured medium-sized pot on the front burner, making sure to fire heat up to hottest level of revenge, thus ensuring the backdrop Chickenhawks have ample time to rattle their limp-fisted sabers. Blindly throw in 30 to 50 thousand pounds of expendable flesh adorned in patriotic platitudes of freedom preserved in the American Way of Life. Once the pot-o’-flesh comes to full boil, drop in several marinade missiles from above, occasionally stirring in a pinch of patriotic zeal to flavor the furor. Stir liberally, occasionally tossing in a splash of fear-induced right-winged propaganda until the flesh has time to congeal. Move to back burner and let medium pot simmer until flesh is cooked through and thoroughly seasoned with rhetorical promises of hope.

After thoroughly stirring all up of the preemptive ingredients in a large two-dimensional fishbowl, pour mixture into a giant mixing bowl, shake well, and strategically (but again, not too strategically) dump into a giant melting pot on the front burner and turn heat up to Shock and Awe. That’s right: Shock and Awe. But don’t let the fireworks seduce you into forgetting about what’s cooking on the back burner.

Always keep an eye on the back burner.

Once the Shock and Awe has fully effervesced, be sure to keep feeding the pot with unseasoned homegrown flesh, adding several thousand pounds every six months or so, mixing in a demonic dash of despotism and bloodied-handfuls of fear as needed.

Stir conservatively for six years, making sure to keep a watchful eye on the back burner.

Pour in a liberal amount of hope into the giant melting pot and move to back burner until long forgotten. Take out and conspicuously dump spoiled ingredients into nearby VA hospital and pour remaining ingredients into medium pot on back burner.

Did you take your eye off the back burner?

Move medium pot back to front burner, add a liberal supply of right-wing propaganda and fresh flesh and turn heat down to: Simmer Indefinitely.

Serves, if ever fully cooked, nobody except special interests and those beholden to the Faustian pact made at the crossroads of Ground Zero and K-Street.

11 comments:

Anonymous said...

Reads my reviews about male enhancement pills befor your buy male enhancement products that really works and effective to increase your health and better your life. thank you. you can reads this reviews at http://www.male-sexual.com - vimax pills - penis enlargement

Anonymous said...

[color=#336699]Great post! thank you for sharing this information. political-fallout.blogspot.com really got under my
[/color] [url=http://nuscin-online.info]skin,[/url] [color=#336699]bookmarked... Keep up the good site...[/color]

Anonymous said...

I would like to exchange links with your site political-fallout.blogspot.com
Is this possible?

Anonymous said...

Hi, i just want to say hello to the community

Anonymous said...

The CORPORATIONS ARE RAPING THE LAND OF OIL AND KILLING BABY SEALS FOR FUN. STOP GLOBAL WARMING. I LOVE AL GORE. BABY. N

Anonymous said...

Brilliant blog posting. I found your post very interesting, I think you are a brilliant writer. I added your blog to my bookmarks and will return in the future.

Anonymous said...

Just popping in to say nice site.

sports handicapping software said...

very interesting!

Anonymous said...

Hey there are using Wordpress for your blog platform?
I'm new to the blog world but I'm trying to get started and set up my own.
Do you need any coding expertise to make your own blog?
Any help would be really appreciated!

Take a look at my blog post Microsoft Office Gratuit

Anonymous said...

You ought to be a part of a contest for one of the greatest blogs online.
I'm going to highly recommend this web site!

Here is my blog post - psn code Generator

Anonymous said...

Have you ever thought about adding a little bit more
than just your articles? I mean, what you say is valuable and all.
Nevertheless just imagine if you added some great visuals or
video clips to give your posts more, "pop"!
Your content is excellent but with pics and video clips, this site could definitely be one of the best in its niche.
Very good blog!

my blog post - dragon city cheat Engine