GOP Hopefuls’ April Fools’ Haikus

I Pity the April Fools’ Haikus

John McCain: Straight Talkin’ Panderer

McCain tours Iraq;
Finds silver lining in hell.
The surge is working.

Tommy Thompson: GOP’s Only “Reliable Conservative”

Screw Democracy!
Socialism in Iraq
Is the only Way!!

Mike Huckabee: GOP’s Marathon Man

A Spartan campaign
Running on shoestring budget:
I’m your Huckabee!

Rudy Giuliani: America’s Soprano

Pledges to clean up
D.C.'s dirty politics.
No? Just ask Kerik!

Tom Tancredo: The Gun Totin’ Xenophobe

Culture we imposed
On Indians is threatened.
Assimilate now!

Sam Brownback: "God’s Senator"

Look before leaping
Your faith in God’s Senator.
Iraq bed of nails.